Chapter 123: Years of Tranquility

Snow and ice buried Cloud City. The enchanting allure of yesterday had transformed into the pristine, snow-laden expanse of today.

The myriad charms hidden beneath a silver veil were better simplified into a quiet resignation to the elements.

Yan Lu and Lu Xugao were staying temporarily at the Blue Ocean City residential complex while their new home was being renovated. After the Lunar New Year’s Eve, they would head to Guangzhou for their second wedding ceremony.

She had originally hoped to keep Yishu with her for the New Year. Over the years, every New Year’s Eve and Spring Festival had been spent with Yishu and Yihui at her home.

This year, it seemed that would not be possible.

Looking back, six years ago, the three of them could still find a glimmer of happiness in simplicity.

Before leaving, Yishu went to visit Yihui alone.

He seemed content, a faint, natural flush appearing on his pale face.

The twenty-some-square-meter studio apartment was kept in meticulous order. When Yishu saw him, he was rolling up his sleeves, scrubbing grease off the kitchen stove.

On the table lay a few books, which appeared to be about love.

Two blue coral-fleece pajamas were laid out across the bed. They were in Yihui’s favorite shade of blue.

"Yihui, I’m leaving for Beijing tomorrow." She scanned the bedroom and turned back to ask, "Are you doing well?"

"Are you going to his place?" He set down the rag, his eyes lowered. "I’m doing very well; he takes good care of me." In truth, the life I want is simple: two people guarding a tiny apartment, with no other extravagant desires. Because he is the greatest extravagance of my life.

"That’s good." Yishu looked at him, her heart full of words, yet she could not utter a single one.

It had always been like this. She tried to emulate the parting scenes from films, perhaps adding rain or snow to render a melancholic atmosphere, accompanied by sorrowful tears to naturally craft the expected sentiment of departure.

But when it came to them, they only overflowed with a profound sense of grief, restraining themselves because their feelings ran too deep.

Yishu looked at him, his youthful face veiled in a faint mist that invisibly added to his radiance.

She had always known that between a brother and sister, there would come a day when they would transition from immediate family to relatives, as one family split into two.

She had always thought it was still a long way off. Countless "long ways off" had finally wasted the years spent in waiting.

"Is he not home?" Yishu reached out to gesture toward someone, but as she lifted her hand, she realized with a start that in this cramped space, there were only the two of them.

"He went out." Yihui poured a cup of water from the kettle and handed it to her. "He said that since many delivery drivers have returned to their hometowns for the New Year, the commissions have doubled, so he could earn a bit extra."

"He’s working as a delivery driver?" Yishu took the cup, found it scalding, and set it on the coffee table. "Why is he doing that?"

Yihui’s facial muscles stiffened, and he spoke with difficulty: "He said there’s nothing wrong with delivering food."

Cheng Shuguang was in his thirties and hadn’t learned a specialized trade when he was younger. He had assumed that opening a tea restaurant would secure his future, but who could have known it would all come to nothing.

The delivery industry was, at the end of the day, a relatively easy way to make money. If one could endure the hardship, a monthly salary of over ten thousand was essentially guaranteed.

As long as one could tolerate the sun and the rain.

As long as one could tolerate being nitpicked.

As long as one could tolerate skipping meals.

As long as...

This was the path they had chosen, and they didn't need to walk it on their knees. Just keep walking, without looking back; that was enough.

Yihui was satisfied with his current life. Long ago, he had yearned for a future as simple and pure as this.

Back in high school, watching those students who broke school rules to sneak into relationships, the delicate strings of his heart were plucked back and forth by an invisible hand.

Perhaps, youth is synonymous with love.

The greenness of youth, the bitterness of love—once past this specific age, even if love were placed before you, you would no longer feel that heart-pounding sensation.

In fact, a girl named Miao Xinyan had once confessed her feelings to Su Yihui. Strictly speaking, it wasn't a confession; she simply sent him snacks every day for a period. She didn't even give them to him directly, but through another girl.

Su Yihui was frightened by her enthusiastic pursuit and hurriedly returned the items. He only said, "I cannot accept these." He offered no other words of rejection. After all, the other party had never confessed to him directly.

Later, he heard that after the girl graduated from high school, she was arranged to be married.

Then again, if it had been a boy who confessed to Su Yihui, perhaps he wouldn't have shrunk away.

During gym class, he would sit in the shade of a tree, looking intentionally or unintentionally at the athletes sweating on the basketball court or the track. But he dared not look too long, fearing others might decipher his true thoughts from his gaze.

Shade-loving plants cannot withstand strong light; this is not the tragedy of avoidance, but their way of life. Yihui had always existed this way.

"And what about you?" Yishu asked him.

Yihui poured himself a cup of hot water and took a small sip. "I plan to look for a job next year, too." He lowered his eyes again. "I don’t need him to support me." Even though he kept telling me he would support me for the rest of my life.

"That’s not what I meant." She took a step forward. "I..." The true thought churning in her heart suddenly scattered into a mist; how could it coalesce into a concrete form?

Yishu gave up trying to capture it.

Should she pity the lone boy in white standing in the snow for being eroded by the bitter cold, or should she hide in the distance, quietly admiring the beauty of a person becoming one with the snowflakes?

Wouldn't letting go bring peace?

A thousand words, a thousand threads, a thousand worries—their final destination all pointed toward that one person. Yihui was the only family Yishu had left in this world; she only prayed for his safety and smooth passage.

"You must take good care of yourself." Yishu picked up her coat from the sofa and put it on. "I should go."

Yihui nodded woodenly. He wouldn't dwell on the trajectory of how things unfolded. He knew his own ability was always limited and insignificant. Rather than accepting defeat after forcing an outcome, it was better to let go from the start.

Yihui leaned against the railing by the window, watching Yishu walk further and further away, his heart a landscape of deep ravines. He knew the words his sister hadn't spoken. He had always known.

They were simply not good at clearly expressing the words that hovered on their lips.

He knew, and she knew. But he didn't know that she knew, and she didn't know that he knew.

Was that the price? To gain something is to lose it. But if you have lost it, can it still be considered a gain?

Yishu looked back at the corresponding apartment, swapping her standard lens for a telephoto, then the telephoto for an ultra-wide angle. Every image within her field of vision multiplied, yet the specific scene she truly sought had fallen into the vast, swirling clouds.

And so, they both stopped searching.

Xu Shixi was waiting for Yishu at the entrance of the complex. He leaned against the car door, his bangs dangling casually between his brows. It wasn't work hours, so he didn't need to comb them back or endure the stiff hair gel that turned his hair into rigid steel spikes.

He was as wonderful as she remembered.

The breeze had suffered the winter's chill, yet it was different from the ordinary cold wind.

The snow piled on the camphor branches shook off, scattering into powder on the ground.

"Why are you here?" Yishu walked up to him.

"I was worried about you." He took her hands and blew warm air onto them repeatedly.

"You're worried about me visiting my own brother?" Yishu let him rub her icy hands.

Xu Shixi smiled brightly. "I was worried about the driver who brought you here."

The car moved forward, grinding the accumulated snow into a puddle of brown slush.

Yishu suddenly turned around. "Shixi, thank you."

"Thank you for what?" He glanced at her.

Thank you for appearing in my life. Thank you for never leaving me behind. She couldn't clearly define what she was thanking him for; it was like a call from a distant land, intermittent and unclear, finally simplifying into two words: "Thank you."

Xu Shixi understood the meaning behind Yishu’s thanks. There was no need to pursue the truth of some things; the hazy aesthetic often left more room for imagination.

Just as he hadn't insisted on accompanying her. Because he knew Yihui’s fragile spirit could not withstand further external interference.

Some things are best kept quietly in the heart.